A heartfelt Thanksgiving

From when east meets west

Thanksgiving Day is a day to give thanks for one's spiritual and material abundance. I remember my first Thanksgiving in 1979 with gratitude to a young American woman with whom I befriended at Neptune Hall, one of the graduate student dormitories in NIU, shortly after I arrived from Taiwan as a graduate student.

Since Thanksgiving is a federal holiday on the fourth Thursday of November, colleges and universities across the country operate on a shortened academic week, so is the residential dinning services. Alone and no place to go, I accepted Ellen's invitation to spend the Thanksgiving holiday with her family. They embraced me and introduced me to a traditional American Thanksgiving feast. After graduation, I lost contact with Ellen, but her kindness and the generosity that her family bestowed on me the real meaning of Thanksgiving years later when I started hosting Thanksgiving dinners.

Michelle, the daughter of my eldest brother, came to California for college in the late 1990's. Unfortunately, the relationship between us was incredibly strained and difficult. For years I agonized over the family feud caused by the discord between aunt and niece and her mother. And for years we were in non-speaking terms though we lived in the same region, in the same state most of the time. It's only until January this year, I left a message on her blog in it she detailed her infertility treatment. My heart ached for her that she had to endure the treatment, then the heartbreak when it didn't work for her. I wanted to refer her to a very good infertility specialist I know, after all, she shares the same blood with me. We were reconnected again, contacting each other sporadically, with great caution I was still hesitant to get involved in her life as those painful experience in the past was still vivid in my mind.

Late in April, she and Nick spent a day with me when I was getting ready for the trip to Taiwan for the wedding of Benson and Christy. We spent a few hours in my club, had a Thai lunch in downtown San Rafael, enjoyed the speculative view of San Francisco across the bay from the waterfront in downtown Tiburon, had delicious pastry at the famous Swiss Bakery there, and visited the chic downtown Mill Valley before they drove back to Walnut Creek. This was the first time that I had the opportunity to get acquainted with her husband, Nick, my new nephew-in-law whom I didn't know for years. The reunion after years of separation turned out fine, albeit with a little awkward moments every now and then throughout the day.

In September when Theresa, the daughter of my third elder brother, who lives in Japan hinted that Michelle would announce her pregnancy at the end of her first trimester for she feared of invoking great expectation from extended family if she made it known only to be disappointed again should it doesn't stick. I felt a pang of concern as to how she could handle the night-shift at a hospital where she works as RN? How she was doing, was it going to be alright this time? I called, offered my concerns and nutrition know-how, listened to her stories of morning sickness, and et cetera. She called when they learned it's a boy. From that point on, the relationship between aunt and niece made a more positive turn, the unborn baby served as the catalyst that helped transform years of family conflict into family peace.

Michelle and Nick were to come over for Thanksgiving. I wanted it to be a healthy, classic, and hearty American Thanksgiving dinner with all organic ingredients, including the turkey. I planned the menu and ordered a 12 pounds organic turkey from WholeFoods two weeks in advance and shopped all the ingredients the weekend before. On Thanksgiving Day, I got up at 5:30 in the morning, got the house ready, went to pick up the turkey and a bouquet of flowers from WholeFoods. By the time Michelle and Nick arrived around noon, I already baked the Cranberry Tea Bread, two Pumpkin Pies, and made the Apple & Sausage Dressing. Michelle help me make the Maple Cranberry Sauce and the Butternut Squash Apple Soup. She also washed and cut the onion, carrot, celery, turnip, baby green zucchini, baby yellow zucchini, sweet potato, lemon, and mushroom that were to be roasted with the turkey. Nick rubbed the herbs and sea salt mixture on the turkey before we set it on the bed of mix vegetables to be roasted for 3 hours and 10 minutes. During the roasting, she also kept time at 30 minutes interval when we basted the turkey with the juice from the roasting pan so to keep it moist and flavorful. While the turkey was cooking in the oven, Nick was so fascinated by my collection of Spode china and silverware that he surfed the web for more information. I am afraid that he is going to start collecting the same pattern as well.

When the turkey was done, we made the gravy from the juices and drippings of the roasted turkey, set the table, took some pictures, I carved the turkey before we sat down. What a wonderful Thanksgiving feast we had! Everything turned out so delicious and tasty! We talked and laughed while enjoying the dishes and the red wine that Nick bought. After dinner, Michelle helped me clean up the dishes, pots and pans, I joked that it's not easy to have a Thanksgiving dinner, but we all felt that it all worth the trouble. Around 10:00 pm, they finally left my house with the a pumpkin pie, a loaf of cranberry tea bread, and container after container of leftovers.

I give thanks not only for the abundance of what I have, but for the heartfelt Thanksgiving that I had longed for finally came true. It always pains me a great deal when family conflict arises, especially as the result of crashes between two opposite cultures and two generations. As I get older, I am more keen on making conscious efforts in maintaining the family relationships that I have. At the end of the day, I want to be able to say that I have done everything I can do and I don't have any unfinished business with my family. God help me!

Note: This is one of my two Christmas catcus plants that bloom around Thanksgiving every year.

From when east meets west

2008 Thanksgiving Dinner Menu:
1. Organic Herbal Roasted Turkey

From when east meets west

2. Organic Apple & Sausage Dressing

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3. Organic Roasted Farmstead Mixed Vegetables

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4. Organic Cranberry Tea Bread

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5. Organic Pumpkin Pie

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6. Organic Maple Cranberry Sauce

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7. Organic Butternut Squash Apple Soup (Oops, I forgot to take picture.)